Thursday

After the grey, chilly, damp weather last week we suddenly went back to summer with deep blue skies, and temperatures in the mid and upper 60s.

 

I don't know if it is because I am old, confused, busy or all three, but I'm having a problem remembering what day it is.  Yesterday, Wednesday morning, I woke up believing it was Tuesday, it wasn't until Chaplain Bill rang in the middle of the morning to see if I was alright, that I learned it was Wednesday and I should have done my chaplaincy round.  I will go in the morning though, Friday.

 

I didn't have any cakes to make for the meal at Emmanuel last night, as it was team Mexican who do their own Mexican cheesecake, but I did go for the meal and the little discussion group.     I told Louise last week that I wouldn't be at Kiwanis this morning, I was going to be busy packing.   I did however go to Communion, then eight of us went to lunch at a nearby Asian diner.

 

As I am going to be off on Sunday afternoon, staying the night at a hotel near the Oklahoma City airport, I will suspend the blog until I come back in January.

 

One thing I wanted to mention that was in the news............an illegal immigrant is suing the US government because a border patrol dog mauled him while he was trying to cross illegally into the country.       The lunatics have taken over the asylum...............................

 

Looking forward to seeing you all, loved ones,  the blog will be back in January, but I might send a few e-mails while I am away.

 

Wishing you all dear readers a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

Sunday morning the 7th

I seem to have got behind with my posts, I think it is probably because I am more focused on what I need to do before coming over for Christmas.

I went to the hospital on Friday, and Kevin - another chaplain - asked me how the neighbours were, and the pit bulls.  He had just seen someone in the Emergency Room whose two pit bulls had got into a fight and she'd tried separating them (!!) one of them sank its teeth into her arm and tore off all the flesh from the elbow down to the wrist.   He asked her if she was having it put down, and she said "oh no, I love him"  (!!!!!!!!!!!)   I told Kevin that this is why they are illegal in Britain.

 

I don't know much about dogs but I thought they had to be put down after something like that, because there is a high incidence of them doing it again, but I am sure there is an Amendment in the Constitution that gives dangerous dogs the right to maim their owners, there certainly has to be something about allowing owners the freedom to have them.    Me, I can't be doing with all these freedoms, I reckon we are safer without our guns and pit bulls, and I'd rather be safe than free.

 

On Friday evening Bruce and Rosalyn kindly invited me to the Shawnee Little Theatre to see 'A Christmas Story, the Musical' which takes place in Indiana in the 1940s, and focuses on a child named Ralphie who set his heart on an air rifle for Christmas.   The child actor played the part brilliantly, I think he'll go far.   What I love about this little theatre in the round is that at the end of the show the audience spills on to the stage and mingles and chats to the cast, it is like a party.   It was all very pleasant and I so appreciate Bruce and Rosalyn inviting me.

 

Yesterday, Saturday, I didn't even venture out at all.   The weather hasn't got any better, it is still damp, chilly and grey, and today - although still dark - doesn't look as if it will be any better.   Bubbles has put her nose outside but soon scampers back in.

 

 

Thursday 4th December

The weather the last few days has been very cold, damp, grey and chilly.   Perhaps it is preparing me for weather at home, where I know I am not going to get blue skies, sunshine and 70 degrees like it was last week.

 

Apart from places I have needed to go to, like the hospital for my chaplaincy rounds, and Emmanuel, I haven't ventured far.  Yesterday I made chocolate cup cakes and shortbread for the Wednesday meal, I delivered them in the afternoon but went back in the evening for the meal, which was made by team lasagna.   I stayed afterwards too for the discussion group.

 

I went to Kiwanis this morning, the speaker was a lecturer in horticulture, and he talked about gardening, it was very interesting, and he had several handouts; perhaps when the weather is a bit warmer I might have a go.  Made a second trip this week to Walmart for some goats milk, and as they still didn't have any I began to wonder if they had stopped selling it, but was told it was expected tonight.  

 

I have been having issues with my wi-fi and my newest C-Nook not downloading the latest book, so while I was up that end of town I went to AT&T where a helpful young man suggested I try unplugging something at the back of the modem, then putting it back in.   Which I have just done, and HEY PRESTO, it worked.  All the books automatically download to both devices, or they do when they work.  I am so glad to have the newest one working before I travel - apart from being lighter it also has a much longer battery life.

 

I am sure you have heard about all the civil unrest and race riots going on here.   It is said that they are spreading across the country, but down here in Shawnee they all seem a long way away.   We don't have any black people here - sorry, 'people of colour' - I can count those I know on one hand.

 

We just have Native Americans and no one disputes their rights.   I heard tonight that a big grievance in New York is the tax on tobacco, but here Native Americans are exempt from a tax on tobacco.  Perhaps they should try exempting people of colour in New York from the tax, it keeps the peace here,     Having said all that, there is however a little bit of a contretemps going on at the moment between the Citizen Potawatomi Nation (so called because they are the only Indian Tribe in the US with dual citizenship) and the City of Shawnee.   White people are charged the standard 8% sales tax in the stores on the Reservation, and the City thinks - perhaps not unreasonably - that this should be handed over to them, so there is a bit of badinage going on about that in City Hall at the moment.

Cyber Monday

It has turned BITTERLY cold, I can't believe I was running around last week in a summer skirt and tee shirt.   There is no gradual change in the weather here, it goes from summer to deepest winter and back again, overnight.  I've just looked at the forecast, it is 31 at the moment,  and it is going from 49 tomorrow up to 60 on Sunday.  So 60 is not too bad for the time of year, I can live with that.

 

I didn't want to, but had to go out this morning.  I went to Emmanuel to lend a hand with packing lunches for the homeless, but the person in charge wasn't there, and I was told by the secretary that she is coming in tomorrow instead.  I thought she might have let me know, I'd have had another cup of tea in bed,  but never mind, I have got other things I would rather be doing on a Monday morning.

 

I think I've got my printer sorted, so that was good.  The guy from the local shop downtown came out and did something and was gone within ten minutes.  He said if I still have problems to ring them, and they will access it remotely and deal with it.   I wouldn't let strangers do that, I refused that option when an online company suggested it, but I think I can trust these people who don't charge me for all their fleeting visits.

 

I am not really into 'journalistic' mode this evening, so think I will finish this off here.

 

Sunday 30th November

Another lovely warm day, in the mid 70s.   In England we would could it an Indian summer, meaning it was unseasonably warm and comes after a killing frost, which it has - the calla lilies are all brown and dead after the frost we had recently.   I need to get out in the garden and pull them up.

Went to Emmanuel at 10.30, but otherwise it has been an uneventful day, apart from Skyping with Jeremy which was the highlight.    I did go to AT&T after church to try and resolve my wi-fi issues, but there were quite a few people in front of me.  Think I will try again in the morning when they open.

I have got all my evening's tv viewing lined up.   It is all on OETA, the Oklahoma Educational Television Authority, and starts at 7 o'clock with the Secrets of Chatsworth House, then it goes to a review of the previous four series of Downton Abbey, and the beginning of the fifth series.  I've sometimes thought I would like to see Downton Abbey, but don't like watching something in the middle of a series when I don't know who the characters are, or what is happening.   Then finally there is an episode of Fawlty Towers; nothing like John Cleese to make me feel really at home.   So I will go and settle down to that.

And speaking of home I am really looking forward to coming over in December and spending Christmas with Jeremy and Pat, doing all the little 'family rituals' our parents instituted.  Tim and family are going to China, but I will see the grand children before they go.

Post Thanksgiving

After Thanksgiving comes the SHOPPING.   Black Friday, Small Business Saturday (ie shop locally) and then it will be Cyber Monday.

 

I did go out yesterday to see if I could find a skirt.   Silly me.   I had forgotten that Oklahoman women  don't wear skirts, they are still dressed for the rugged frontier.  The local department store had rows and rows of blue jeans and trousers, but not a skirt in sight.  I'll have a little foray into M&S when I come over.

 

So the only 'bargain' I ended up with was 5 boxes of chocolate cake mix for $5.   That will be enough cakes for the kiddos for two or three Wednesdays.

 

This morning, Saturday, I was running round town doing my errands.  I called on my friend Jay to see if she would feed Bubbles while I am away, and to my ENORMOUS joy and relief said she would be pleased to, she wasn't going anywhere.

 

Then I had to go to the AT&T store, the local wireless provider because all of a sudden my C-Nook was demanding a Wi-Fi Password before I could read anything (WHAT!! no one has ever told me about that, where am I supposed to find that??  Life in the 21st century is becoming just too trying for me.    I went online for support and got one of those supercilious young men who have no patience with little old ladies who don't know what they are talking about.   He looked me up and got hold of my cell phone records, so that didn't get us anywhere.

So  I go into the AT&T store at the Mall and I am met at the door by a very gracious young woman who informed me my Wi-Fi password is on the back of my router.   And Lo and Behold it was.  Who Knew!!   Certainly not the supercilious young man who should have done.

I wrote the above paragraph this morning, and it is now evening and I went back to the issues with my C Nook (can I hear you saying "why doesn't she just pick up a printed book with paper pages") That's all very well but I have got 107 books on my CNook, and I haven't read them all, not to mention the sequel of the one I have just finished which I am waiting to read.   Anyway, I got hold of a very nice, helpful agent this evening, Heidi (I have come to the conclusion that all customer service agents should be women, young men should be barred from jobs dealing with confused old women) and Heidi managed to download the book to my older device.  The problem with the newer one is the Wi-Fi connection, so I will be back to AT&T in the morning,  and at least their staff are helpful even if I don't reckon their Wi-Fi connection.

So after all that stress I am ready to call it a day, and read said book, albeit on the heavier, older device that doesn't glow.

But just a word about the weather, which has been lovely.  Blue skies, sunny, in the 70s.  I finally feel I am enjoying some summer.
 

 

Thanksgving and Black Friday morning.

I had a nice Thanksgiving, Kevin picked me up, and another friend of his from Emmanuel who lives on the way to his brother's - about half an hour out of Shawnee - and is in the same age group as he is,  about the same age as my sons.   He is a single father with a teenage son, soon to go to college, so we were a little party of four, and I think I counted 16 round the table altogether.

 

I thought Kevin's house was big but his brother's is even more huge, also with a lot of land around it.  After lunch the guys all went out on motor bikes on the trails surrounding the house.   They obviously all have several bikes each, which are their toys.  Kevin said he gets the daily 'Oklahoman' and if he sees a good bargain he can't resist, he gets it.  I found fascinating this insight into how the other half live, and what they spend their money on. 

 

Kevin has a very kind heart - as well as cutting the grass for little old ladies he reaches out to anyone who needs help.   On the way to his brother's he did a U turn in the road because he saw a pick-up parked at the side, and thought the owner might need help.  However, he had run out of gas and had just picked some up.

 

While the guys were out on the motor bikes, and a crew I guess were busy in the kitchen, Kevin's other Emmanuel friend and I were sitting in a little group at the table, chatting, and it was all very pleasant.

 

When getting dressed yesterday I put on a skirt which practically fell off me.  I haven't been dieting or trying to lose weight, but it seems I must have done.  So maybe I will venture into the Black Friday mayhem and see if there are any bargains in skirts.

 

On a tv programme this morning there was an item about the things most people are looking for in the sales, things you would expect, like i-Pads and televisions, but third on the list was sheets!!!  The tv anchor man was very bemused, so was I.

 

Wednesday 26th November

I almost never sleep late in the morning but for some reason woke up at 10.30 this morning, sniffling and sneezing, so didn't get to my chaplaincy round.    It didn't come to anything, this cold I thought I had, so went shopping at Walmart.   Being the day before Thanksgiving the car park was very full, even far out, where the fat people have to go, but there weren't queues at the checkouts, I think people were just browsing the bargains which will be on sale on 'Black Friday', when they start their Christmas shopping.

 

Been getting the house tidy and in order, as one does before a holiday, even if no one will see it.  Kevin kindly invited me to his brother's house though tomorrow, but I think he wants me to be all ready to jump in the car, he said he is coming at 11, but will ring just before he leaves. 

 

He said everyone is bringing something, would I like to take either a green bean casserole or a dessert.  Green bean casserole is a southern thing, and a mandatory side dish at Thanksgiving.  I love them - they are green beans stirred into a creamy mushroom sauce topped with crispy fried onions (usually bought ready fried and crisp in the supermarket) but I certainly didn't want to make something American.   I opted for dessert, and bought a pecan and a pumpkin pie (also mandatory desserts at Thanksgiving) and this evening made some little chocolate orange cakes (I don't know how many are coming but am guessing at quite a crowd)   As I haven't iced them yet, this is what they are supposed to look like -

 

 

While they were baking I popped a bit of the chocolate in my mouth and it was very bitter.  I'd got 100% unsweetened cacao thinking it would give a good chocolaty flavour; the bitterness though wasn't apparent in the cake which was quite nice, and I found some semi-sweet chocolate in the cupboard for the frosting, so they should be alright.

 

In the news...........

I am sure you have heard about the race riots which have broken out across the nation because a white cop shot an unarmed black teenager who had just robbed a convenience store, and who incidentally was wrestling through the car window for the officer's gun.    The black community, and probably the liberals, think the cop should be charged, preferably with murder but at least with manslaughter, and certainly not get off scot free, which is what has happened

 The police officer was interviewed on television and my heart goes out to him, he is twenty eight years old and his career is over, he will obviously have to move away to another state, I wish him all the best.

 

What I also found very heartbreaking yesterday in the dreadful riots and chaos going in the town where it happened, was a young mother who had a little business making cakes, and she was standing in the middle of her looted, destroyed shop with tears running down her face.

 

This morning though there was good news.   A lot of people sent her  money to help her get back on her feet,  and donations poured in.  And she was interviewed today looking very happy and positive.   Americans are so generous like that, they do rush to assist anyone in need.    When I had a major repair to the car, I never said anything about cost of it, or affording it - I'd rather die - but probably because it is a beat-up old car so I am obviously not affluent,  a kind friend in the church asked if I needed help with the repair bill.

  

This is a very rare species of tiger Putin released into the wild, and it wandered into China and killed - and presumably ate - 15 goats.   Part of me wants to laugh and another part feels very sorry for the owner of the goats.    I think the idiot Putin should have released it deep in Russia, not on the border of China.

 

 

 

Tuesday 25th November

I have been engaged in projects I need to finish in time before Christmas.   As I told  you, loved ones, you are going to get home made presents (if I finish them in time).

I went to the gospel singing at the Senior Centre, I haven't been for a long time, not since I got busy. It was very nice and everybody is so friendly.   

I looked round at the seniors, the veterans in their Korean War baseball caps, and reflected on the fact that when I was a child veterans - or old soldiers - were people who fought in the Boer War, and there were quite a few of them about, until I was in my late teens.   There was always a good contingent of them among the Chelsea Pensioners at the Remembrance Day Service at the Albert Hall.   And as the Second World War finished 69 years ago, there can't have been many servicemen of that war at the Albert Hall this year.  I guess like the seniors here, those who were there were from the Korean War.

Nothing like looking back on your nation's wars to realise how old you've become!   

Today in history.......

2348 BC.    The day of the Flood, you know, when Noah built his Ark and packed all the animals in it.   Goodness knows how they worked that out.  

1963            The day President Kennedy was buried.  He was assassinated on the 22nd.  One of those moments in history when we always remember where we were, what we were doing.

Op-Ed

I was going to write this yesterday in the ‘news’ but I was a bit tired.   Anyway, it can be my op-ed, as they say, ha ha.

John Kerry has recently ‘had talks with’ Iran, and has appeared in various photo shoots looking very pleased with himself.   Is this naïveté, incredible stupidity, or something far more serious?   I ask myself.    I also ask myself if the President and the White House have been on the same planet as me for the last thirty odd years.   It cannot have escaped their attention that Iran is bound and determined, and repeatedly state their commitment, to ‘wipe Israel off the face of the earth’.

Is it just my generation that remembers the horrors of the Holocaust, the sufferings of the Jewish people?   I know the creation of the state of Israel wasn’t fair, Chaim Weizmann - the first President  - acknowledged it wasn’t fair that Palestinians were dispossessed in order to create a homeland for Jewish people, but as we all tell our children “life isn’t fair”.  And Iran’s proposed genocidal killing of the Jewish people in Israel today cannot be acceptable in anybody’s faith tradition.  And John Kerry thinks he has dissuaded Iran from this?????  What planet does he live on, or have I - like Alice in Wonderland - fallen down a hole and am now on another planet?

I have sometimes wondered - and I know this is a massive over simplification - as there are now more Palestinians living in Jordan than there are Trans Jordanians, why the Jordanian monarchy (itself a creation of relatively modern times) doesn’t do the generous thing and abdicate its kingdom, to allow the Palestinian people a homeland of their own.   Like I say, a massive over simplification of a problem, and many would say ‘unrealistic’.

Monday 24th November

Just when I thought nothing more could go wrong in Obama's America, race riots break out across the nation, the catalyst for them being the shooting of a "black unarmed" teenager who had just robbed a convenience store, and was walking down the middle of the road, winding up a "white" police officer.    There is a confrontation, which escalates..............and I am sure you have heard the rest.  I see it has been reported on the BBC, and The Mail.

 

Whatever the ins and outs of this particular incident, it is obviously an indication of a far more serious racial issue going on, and this just ripped the scab off.

 

Meanwhile, back in Shawnee OK, I have been going about my business.  I had a (mandatory) flu shot this morning at the hospital.  I was running out of time, if I hadn't had it this week I could no longer go round visiting patients.   So there was a great deal of drama in the chaplaincy office, and references to sheep and slaughter.  And it hurt, but the nurse was all smiles and hugs when it was all over.

 

After that I went to Emmanuel to lend a hand packing lunches for the homeless.

 

This afternoon I went to a memorial service conducted by Fr Bill at the Senior Centre.   It was for a homeless person, who froze to death in the park.    He was well known locally, the Senior Centre was his daytime home.   I was stunned actually at his death.   The Salvation Army takes in homeless people, but only on a temporary basis, one can't stay there indefinitely.    Homelessness is a major problem here.

 

This isn't very cheerful is it, perhaps it will be better tomorrow.

Sunday 23rd November

An uneventful Sunday.    The big highlight was talking to the family on Skype, other than that I just went to the 10.30 service at Emmanuel, and this evening I joined Pattisue at University Baptist as Chaplain Bill was preaching.

The weather here is unbelievable.   During the day it was like an English summer's day; blue sky, sunshine, 63.   When I went out this evening it was cold with a strong wind and heavy rain.

Perhaps tomorrow will be more exciting.

Saturday

Big sigh of relief - I can post my pictures!!

This dear little lady who is 101, lives in a retirement home in landlocked Tennessee and all her life wanted to see the beach.  She was finally able to when she won a competition of wishes, and was taken down to the coast of Alabama.

Bless.  Her aides did help her out of the beach buggy so she could get her feet wet, but that picture didn't come out.  I don't know what part of Tennessee she came from, but the distance of Alabama north to south is 362 miles.    I didn't think there was much beach on the Gulf Coast of Alabama, but it stretches 32 miles.

Very heavy drenching rain all day outside, and have been reading.   I bought a thrift book, ie $1.99, about cat behaviour, which is very interesting.  It is by Desmond Morris, who I think most of you know.

Learned all sorts of things.   Apparently, cats are carnivores, which I guess I knew.  But what I didn't know was that a vegetarian diet can kill them.  And it tells us what happens to them if they eat a vegetarian diet, and it's not pretty, they die a pretty painful death.      Who knew!    I know proper cat food is best, which is what Bubbles gets, but I didn't know anything else was harmful.   My next door neighbour once had a job delivering pizzas, and her animals got the left-over pizzas.   I guess the cats must have been kept alive with the peperoni.

Also, that cats want a very quiet environment, they hate loud noises.  So THAT'S why next door's cats were beating a path to my front door.    Theirs is the noisiest house on the block with the barking dogs, and all the yelling.  She keeps yelling at them to shut up.   This place is pretty quiet, it is just as well for Bubbles I am not watching cops and robbers on television.  All she has to put up with is Fox News and the Food Network, and they're not loud.

Friday morning

I haven't written up the blog since Sunday, I don't know where the last few days have gone, except I have had computer and printer issues, and been hanging out at Staples with the tech guys, who are beginning to become a surrogate family.

There was a power failure yesterday.  At first it went out,  came back momentarily, then went down again, during which time the computer went bang.   When it came back several hours later it was displaying frightening messages I'd never seen before, which led me to believe the hard drive was totally beyond repair.    The dismay.   The angst.   Ran back to the surrogate family, left it there until the early evening, and when I picked it up it was fine - they hadn't done anything and refunded the charge I had to pay up-front for them to look at it.    The printer needs to be re-booted, but I haven't psyched myself up for that yet, I'm deep down afraid that if it doesn't work after that, I won't know what to do next.

Anyway,  yesterday morning I put the Kiwani's bulletin on a memory stick, took it to the Senior Centre, who had never seen such a thing before (Kate is away) so they were pleased to have a lesson in something new, and Louise got her bulletins.

The Kiwani's speaker was supposed to be someone from Saving Pets at Risk, but she didn't turn up, which I thought was a bit off.   So Louise talked about several issues.  One of which is the necessity to sell raffle tickets for the Collectors' Dolls (I have to say they look pretty common-or-garden to me, I wouldn't want to collect them, but what do I know).   Someone suggested we all take some into our banks and flog them, presumably to passing customers.   Thinks "that certainly wouldn't fly in Lloyds TSB in Seaford, I'd be laughed - or escorted - off the premises" .  I don't even think it is going to fly in Banc First, I'm certainly not up for it, it looks too desperate.

So far tickets sold amount to $86, which Louise doesn't think is nearly enough.  I think she should forget the 'collectors' bit and try the local child  care centres.

I went to Communion yesterday, but we didn't go to lunch.  Fr Bill had a meeting to go to, and some of the regular people there were absent.

Last night it was the meeting of the local poetry group, who gather in the local high-deli restaurant.  When I was at Fr Clark's little supper party I met an Englishman who grew up in Brighton, and he invited/suggested I might like to go to this.  I debated it, it might have been nice to talk to someone English from Brighton, but it was dark and cold outside and I decided I preferred the evil Fox News.

And there is certainly plenty going on.  The nation - it seems to me - looks on the verge of anarchy.  Obama is about to let in - or give amnesty to - 5 million illegal aliens, or undocumented persons if you are politically correct.   Republicans collectively are apoplectic, oh the chagrin, the outrage!!!!

And there is a state of emergency in a town in Missouri.   Some weeks ago a white policeman shot a "black, unarmed, teenager" (who had, incidentally, just robbed a convenience store) and a Grand Jury have been meeting to decide whether or not to indict the police officer.   At the time of the incident the police officer didn't know about the robbery, they got into a confrontation when he told the teenager and his friend not to walk down the middle of the road, which doesn't sound unreasonable to me.  

I don't know all the ins and outs of the incident, but a scuffle took place in the police car, teenager tried to grab the officer's gun, got shot in the hand (that wasn't the fatal wound, but the teenager's blood is in the car).   The ensuing details are all a bit murky and hazy until the findings of the Grand Jury which I think will be announced today, all the riot police are out on the streets. 

The black community and the rabble rousers, and the nation's chief rabble rouser, the Rev Al Sharpton, if you have ever heard of him, are alleging that the teenager was shot in the back by the evil white police officer.    We shall see.

And I think it is time to post this.   I am about to look at the 8 o'clock news, then will do my hospital chaplaincy round.

Sunday 16th November 2014

Winter has certainly arrived, with a vengeance.   There is this evening a thick layer of snow on my car.   However it is forecast sunshine tomorrow, so hopefully it will melt it off before I have to go out.


I made the carrot soup last night and gingerly carried the crock pot down the porch steps, got it into the car, but there was a film of ice over it, and although it wasn't all that thick I saw I would have to get the de-icer to the windscreen.   I sat in the car for a few moments, but I was so cold I just didn't have the energy to clear the windscreen, and get myself to Emmanuel.   So carried the soup back indoors.


So haven't done a lot today.   I picked up the computer on Friday from Staples, but it will have to go back.  I can't post photos on the blog, so they will certainly have to put that right.   And there are a couple of other issues.


When I was talking about the Election recently there were a couple of things I forgot to mention.  One is that, when they have all these captive voters in the polling booths they don't just vote for political candidates for office, they also have a long laundry list of referenda to vote on as well (I don't know why they don't just let their elected representatives get on with making decisions, however not for me to reason why)  One issue was whether or not to allow alcohol to be served on Sundays in restaurants in Shawnee, and that was defeated.  I was very disappointed, not because I am desperate for a drink with my Sunday lunch, but there are a several restaurant chains I like, which have branches in nearby towns, but they won't open in Shawnee.   These rigid little southern Baptists.


Another referendum in Oregon I found very curious.   941,000 people - and that was more people than voted for candidates, would you believe - turned out to reject giving driving licences to illegal immigrants!!!   I can't figure that.  By definition they shouldn't be there, so why are they applying for driving licences. I would have thought that being in the country illegally they would keep their heads down under the radar.


This day in history.....1907


Oklahoma became the 46th state in the Union.


The US had acquired Oklahoma from France in 1803 as part of the Louisiana Purchase. 


After the War of 1812, the U.S. government decided to remove Indian tribes from the settled eastern lands of the United States and move them west to the unsettled lands of Oklahoma, Kansas and Nebraska.


In 1828, Congress reserved Oklahoma for Indians and in 1834 formally ceded it to five southeastern tribes as Indian Territory.


Many Cherokees refused to abandon their homes east of the Missippi, and so the U.S. Army moved them west in a forced march known as the "Trail of Tears."  A famous event everyone here knows about, even foreigners like me.


During the Civil War, most tribes in Indian Territory supported the South. With the defeat of the Confederacy in 1865, the territory was placed under U.S. military rule. 


White cattlemen and settlers began moving in, and after the arrival of the railroad in the 1870s, illegal white incursion into Indian Territory flourished. Most of these "Boomers" were expelled, but pressure continued until the federal government agreed in 1889 to open two million acres in central Oklahoma for white settlement. At noon on April 22, 1889, a pistol shot signaled the opening of the new land, and tens of thousands of people rushed to stake claims.


Those who had already made illegal entry to beat the starting gun were called "Sooners," hence Oklahoma's state nickname. The following year, the region was divided into Indian Territory and Oklahoma Territory.

Saturday

Saturday morning
Trying to remember what I have done lately, but further back than 24 hours is a bit of a stretch.   I did have a highlight last night though, Bruce and Rosalyn invited me to the theatre on the OBU campus to see  "Much Ado about Nothing"  in a modern setting, but with Shakespeare's original language.  It was a lovely evening and I so appreciated them asking me.




Saturday evening
The day has moved on, a lot of it spent hanging out at Staples, behind the counter at the technical desk.   I have been having computer issues. Although I was invited behind the counter I wasn't supposed to be there, the technician and I were  doing things we shouldn't, like trying to get into my e-mail - he said they are not supposed to be privy to information like that but the manager was turning a blind eye.  I told the technician I wanted to at least be able to Skype, and access my e-mail and my blog this weekend - he said he understood.


So I might be taking it back on Monday.  Although the guy helping me today was very computer savvy he wasn't actually one of the technical guys, none of whom seemed to be about this afternoon.


I have also been doing more cooking than I felt like.    The hospital gives it volunteers a turkey just before Thanksgiving, and I took mine on Thursday where it has been thawing out in my hall.   I'd thought of donating it, dropping it off at the Salvation Army, but I am sure they have plenty, so I am cooking it.  Then I will cut it up and freeze it in portions - like I say, a lot more work than I really wanted.    ALSO, tomorrow at Emmanuel we are all asked to take a crock pot of soup.   One church member, a potter, made 50 ceramic bowls which we are asked to buy at $15 each, and have a lunch of soup.  The money raised will go towards the feeding ministries - the lunches for the homeless and their monthly breakfast.  I just got the calculator out and 50 bowls at $15 each I think is $750, so that is worth doing.




So as I type, I have got soup in my crockpot, a turkey in the oven, and another soup for my supper simmering on the stove.  I threw the turkey giblets into a pan for the stock for tonight's supper; why do I give myself so much work, I ask myself.    Not only that, my dodgy shoulder is hurting from all this carrying around of printers, computers and turkeys.


While all this activity was going on I did have a phone call from Michael at the monastery at Beaumont, inviting me for Thanksgiving, he said he'd recorded 'Last Night at the Proms' for me to see.   Bless.  I said I'd let him know after the weekend, but I don't think I can manage it, it is too soon to my trip home.  I did appreciate the invite and the affection though.

Veterans Day

Veterans Day -  is a BIG DEAL holiday, not one on which only banks are closed, and everyone else goes about their normal business, but  the Senior Centre is closed as well, a sure sign that a holiday is IMPORTANT.      

 

It originated as “Armistice Day” on Nov. 11, 1919, the first anniversary of the end of World War I, then Congress passed a resolution in 1926 for an annual observance, and Nov. 11 became a national holiday beginning in 1938.

 

It is not to be confused with Memorial Day (the fourth Monday in May) which honours American service members who died in service, while Veterans Day pays tribute to all American veterans - living or dead - but especially gives thanks to living veterans.   I may have said this before, but I do admire tremendously the way in which servicemen and women, and veterans, are treated in this country.   If they appear on television they are always thanked for their service.  The Golden Corral gives them free meals on Veterans Day.

 

 I don't think it was always ever thus - I have an idea that it came about after Vietnam, when returning military were treated so badly it became a national disgrace, that people have been putting right ever since.

 

I haven't done anything special.  Just went out to fill the car, and  gas prices are falling, I think this was the cheapest I think I have seen here.

$2.93 is £1.84 a gallon.

 

I am bemused at the fact that £1.84 a gallon isn't cheap enough, motorists also need to be bribed with free popcorn every day, and coffee on Tuesdays.  And another pump was advertising a free fountain drink, which I think means Coke, or something like that.  $26.92, which is what it cost me to fill up, is £16.91.  Oklahoma is cheaper than the national average.

In the news....................
I have of course been watching the news all day.    Remember her?????? It was a big murder trial I was telling  you about when it was going on last year, and her sentencing trial has just begun..

In self defence she stabbed her boyfriend 22 times, slit his throat, then shot him in the forehead for good measure.   But it is being said she might walk free because police apparently deleted evidence. I don't know why that didn't come out in the original trial, I thought the jury were just called to sentence her.   I don't hold with all this dragging out the case - the jury should just bring in a verdict and let the judge hand down the sentence, like we do.

The weather is very bright and sunny, but COLD.  I keep reminding myself that this was what I wanted when it was 103.

I think this is the first time I have seen Oklahoma actually mentioned on a weather map.  I usually have to look at Arkansas and New Mexico to give me a rough idea.

Over 2 feet of snow up in Michigan, round the Great Lakes.   I am glad I am down here, it doesn't get that bad south of the Mason Dixon line.

My readership plummeted from 46 the other day, to 4 yesterday.  That should tell me something.

Monday 10th November

Goodness, this has been hard work today.  When I changed my tv company back in June I told the providers, Dish Network, to collect their equipment, I would leave it on my porch.  And it has languished there since then.   Then at the end of last week I discover, without any by or leave, that they snatched $243 out of my bank account for said equipment.   The last thing I wanted to do was risk a fall carrying these big boxes down my porch steps, but felt I now had no choice, and did so very gingerly.  Then I struggled to open - with  my hands full - the door of the local office, and threw them in.  

 

I'll give them a day or so to refund the money to my account.

 

Before that though I took the flowers from Emmanuel to the hospital and had lunch with Bill and another chaplain, and that was very nice.  

 

This day in history..........

 

1971

Two women are tarred and feathered in Belfast for dating British soldiers.    I remember that.  I do sometimes forget though Northern Irish antipathy to the British, I just remember the tremendous kindness of  all the people I knew in the Irish Republic toward myself and my father, who lived there.    There's an Irish-American woman who lived in Shawnee, but has recently moved away, who was always very hostile toward me, and her husband murmured once, very quietly - so quietly I afterward wondered if I'd heard right - that she is anti British.

 

1941

Churchill promises to join the U.S. "within the hour" in the event of war with Japan.   I don't know who is being sceptical here, me or Churchill.   Didn't the US  'join us' after they were bombed in Pearl Harbour? 1989   German citizens begin tearing down the Berlin Wall.   I remember that, and it has had a lot of news coverage over here, remembering it.

There are said to be as many rodents in New York as people.   Although someone said they don't know how they were counted.

 

Sunday 9th November

I was going to say "Winter has Arrived"  and it certainly seemed like it when I was scraping ice off the windscreen this morning so I could get the donuts.   But by lunchtime it was a warm, beautiful, balmy day, blue skies and temperature in the 70s.   So I don't know.

 

I lost my cell phone, searched through all the recently used handbags and pockets, and was just on the point of going to get a replacement when it turned up.  But it was such a lovely day in the late afternoon sunshine that I went to the AT&T store, just to see what phone I might have bought had the missing one not turned up.    I was quite captivated by a slim smart phone, under a $100, but I didn't succumb.

 

Seem to have got behind with the blog, think I have been feeling a bit under the weather, but perked up today after talking to Jeremy, Tim, precious grand daughters and Marie's very sweet mother, via Davina interpreting.

 

Nothing notable has happened in the last few days.  Was at the hospital on Friday, then had lunch with Bill.   I don't think I am breaching any confidentiality - since you don't know anyone in Shawnee, far less anyone who might be in hospital - if I say I came across a patient with 'beer potomania'.   It is a disorder in which someone drinks so much beer  - a really excessive quantity of beer - that they become very ill, not just from the alcohol, but from the huge quantity of beer destroying, I think, the electrolytes in the body.    I have never heard of this, and I worked in a hospital.  I wondered if any doctors in the UK had ever heard of it.  Or if it is a newly discovered American thing?

The number of people daily reading the blog ranges from half a dozen to ten,  but yesterday an astonishing 46 read it!!!    I can't imagine how 46 people suddenly stumbled across it.

Remember, Remember the 5th November .....

Hope you all had a good Guy Fawkes Day......fireworks, bonfires?

Oh Woe is Me.    I felt for a few days the car wasn't quite right, was going to call Terry, then turning into my drive this afternoon, it felt as though the engine was falling out.   I rang Terry and he came straight out - I said to him after we took the car to his workshop and he was running me home, that he was more than a mechanic, he is a really good friend.   I don't know what I'd do without him. Anyway, it needs some major repair but he should finish it tomorrow.

 

Driving me home we were talking about the fact that there have been quite a few home invasions lately in the area, including the old woman who was woken up by the bandits demanding money, and in spite of trying to give them everything she had, they still beat her up.  I said I thought perhaps I need to get a gun, so Terry was telling me about the arsenal he keeps in his bedroom, on his nightstand and under the bed, and if he is away from home for a night he leaves the big pistol on the nightstand for his wife to use.    He was also saying he was very happy about the Republicans taking the Senate last night because they won't interfere with his gun rights, and also from last night Oklahomans have got the right to openly carry them.   They used to have to conceal them.

 

I asked if we would be charged with murder, or manslaughter, if we shot dead an intruder and Terry said that as long as they were on our property, and we were obviously defending ourselves we wouldn't be. 

 

Anyway, I am giving it some thought, and don't worry, I am not going to waltz into Walmart tomorrow to pick one up.    The local gun shop owner is a good friend at Emmanuel, I will chat to him when I am about and mobile again.   He has a gun range behind the shop, and would show me how to use it.

Anyway, enough of me and guns.   Yesterday was the Election, today is the 'Inquest'.  Phrases like 'Tide is Turning' and 'Start of a New Day' are being bandied about.  And probably because I watch the evil Fox News there are lots of beaming, smiling faces.   I was telling Chaplain Bill that although the Election doesn't make any difference to me, one result I felt really glad about was the defeat of the wannabe Democrat Governor of Texas because she is in favour of - and would have brought in - legislation for late term abortions.  So we had a little rejoicing at the unborn saved by her defeat.

 

Earlier in the day, before going to the hospital (my goodness I've been busy today) I made some orange jellies for the young people at Emmanuel this evening, and had actually just delivered them and was going home when the car crisis occurred.    I took them in daylight because of the clocks going back, I am now a little unsure at driving after dark, but it is just two straight main roads to Emmanuel, I think I will probably be able to manage that in future.

 

 

Election Day

It has been very, very wet.  Really heavy drenching rain for hours on end.  No wonder Oklahoma is so green, it is like Ireland.   And not only wet now, but cold too.  I can't believe it was less than a week ago I took that photo of the Horse in the City, and what a lovely day that was, what a brilliant blue sky, temperatures in the 70s, and I was running around in a tee shirt.   I thought summer was here (I don't know what they call that season when it is unbearably hot, in triple digits) but it seems to have gone, the lovely short lived summer last week.

 

As to the Election, it is as they say, all over bar the shouting.  I have been looking at the results coming in and fairly early in the evening - 10.30 Central Time - the Republicans had gained 6 seats which was what they needed to have control of the Senate.   So Republicans have control of the Senate and Congress, and Obama is said to be "irritated".  

No surprises, no interest, in Oklahoma.  The Republican Governor is, predictably, back for another term.

Saturday 1st November.

Pattisue and I enjoyed the movie last night, The Judge.  It took some time to get into, but it was brilliantly acted from start to finish, and I was surprised at the ending.    I would see it again if it came downtown, I think there were nuances I didn't pick up on, things I am not quite clear about.    When we came out it was really chilly, and we decided winter was on the way.   And today it was 47 as I drove through town.

Today has been uneventful, enjoyed a chat with Jeremy on Skype.

Today in history.....

1903		London's Daily Mirror newspaper is first published. That's earlier than I would have thought.
1920		The first radio broadcast in the United States is made from Pittsburgh.  And that's later.
1942		Lieutenant General Dwight D. Eisenhower arrives in Gibraltar to set up an American command post for the invasion of North Africa.   My Dad was there then, I wonder if he saw him, or knew he was there.  But if he did he probably thought he was just some Yank.  I got into a bit of a pickle with the layout here, copying and pasting, and don't know why I can't put it right.   1960    A British jury determines that Lady Chatterley's Lover is not obscene.  I remember that, it was a big deal.  Everyone was talking about it, and queuing up to buy it.   1936    The first high-definition public television transmissions begin from Alexandra Palace in north London by the BBC.    That's earlier than I would have thought.  We got our first television for the Coronation in 1953.   (Anne - do you remember that?  Your parents were there as well, and we lived in Birdhurst Road)   Born on 2nd November 1734   Daniel Boone, American frontiersman and explorer.  My friend Vicki Sparks, chaplain Larry's wife, is Daniel Boone's 5th great grand daughter.

Halloween SIGH

I'm ready for the Trick and Treaters.   Last year I wasn't and when confronted by a sea of bright-eyed eager faces I was stricken, apologised profusely, and the leader rushed to assure me it was all right. 

If I don't get any takers tonight - and I'm going to the movies at 7 with Pattisue - I'll take them to Emmanuel for a Wednesday evening dessert.  

And just how are the British public dealing with this major Constitutional crisis, the biggest since Edward VIII in 1936, not to mention the 16 Commonwealth nations?   And do you know, it hasn't even been mentioned here on cable news, the American public are more interested in nurses defying the Ebola ban, and crashed space flights.   Imagine!!

It does seem to have escaped these morons that Prince Charles, not Prince William is next in line of succession.   And has it crossed the morons minds that if Prince Charles - God Forbid - died tomorrow, the next in line after Prince William is the one year old Prince George, so what a long Regency that would be.   And would William and Kate inflict that upon their child.   They just have no idea, these STUPID, STUPID, morons.

Pattisue and I are going to see 'The Judge' a mystery thriller.   She is picking me up, so I won't be driving in the dark.

Thursday 30th October

A new Horse in the City has appeared...

I couldn't find out anything about it though, it is not online with the others, so I don't know who has sponsored it, and there isn't a plaque either to tell us.    I did see online though a couple I have not previously photographed and posted, so I will track them down.

It was Kiwanis of course this morning, and the little ghost story in the bulletin went down well, there were a few chuckles.

I think the speaker though was one of the worst we have ever had.   When I was doing the bulletin I asked Louise to tell me a bit about him, and this was what I got, as it was told to her......   

Mr Corrick began his writing career at the age of nine at Harrison School in Shawnee.   At age eleven he produced a short documentary.  He had a radio program that ran at one time in forty five countries.  His IQ is 181.  He took the first accredited course for Broadcasting in Washington DC in 1976.  He has taught at South West Christian University, St Gregory’s and Tel Aviv Universities.  He has also worked for Frank Keating, and has been a Federal Tax Judge.

We were not entertained (at least I wasn't, and I don't think Louise was).   Frank Keating is a former governor of Oklahoma.

It was a much happier event at noon when I went to Communion at Emmanuel, and afterwards seven of us went to the nearby Asian Diner, which was very nice, and does excellent meals - I had thick Japenese noodles with prawns (but all prawns here are called shrimp, regardless of their size) It was good company, lovely people, and all very pleasant.

I have been out and about today - this evening I went to the Art Gallery and Museum on the St Gregory's campus.   The evening started with a cheese and wine Reception.  Most of the events are usually for the general public, but this was the annual event for members, or 'Friends,' of the Museum.  To 'reward' us as it were, for being members.

Georgia O'Keefe ( 1887 – 1986) was a prominent American artist in the 1920s and has been called the Mother of American Modernism.  She made large format paintings of enlarged blossoms, presenting them close up as if seen through a magnifying lens.   Also, New York buildings, dating from the same decade.

She made her permanent home in northern New Mexico in 1949, and depicted subject specific to that area.

This evening an actress played the part of her, and described her life and work, and showed us slides of her paintings.   She did it well, and it was very interesting.

I left shortly before the end though - I think she was getting to the end - because I was getting a bit panicky about getting home in the dark, even though the drive was only 15 minutes.  I haven't been driving at night for some time, but until now I have felt alright driving around Shawnee because I know my way around, but I feel my eyesight recently has deteriorated, and I am losing confidence at driving at night.   Slipping out a bit early, before anyone else, made it easier to drive out of the campus.




  

Wednesday 28th October

I am feeling a lot better.   I had a bit of a headache this morning, but it gradually eased off during the day.   I did my chaplaincy round at the hospital, and got round quite quickly because a lot of patients had precaution notices on their doors, which means they are infectious, or prone to catching infections, and I know most of the chaplains dutifully don gowns, masks, gloves etc. but I just bypass the room.  Conscious of my uninsured state I don't take chances, and Chaplain Bill understands.

This afternoon I knocked up some chocolate cupcakes for the kiddos at Emmanuel, and also made some shortbread - which is so easy, just butter, brown sugar and flour - and it seems to go down well.

I didn't go there for the meal though, I went instead to a movie at 5 o'clock.  I saw 'Left Behind', it has been on some time so it was my last chance to see it.   I remember reading the book about 20/30 years ago but I couldn't remember it, only that  I was impressed with the book, and it was apocalyptic.   It was very, very good.  Very exciting, I'd chewed my fingernails down by the time it finished.

Halloween is a big deal here, it's not a place to live when you hate it as much as I do.  But I keep telling myself it will soon be over.

This is the house opposite me.................

 

 

I was looking for a story/joke tonight for the Kiwani's bulletin in the morning, and came across this, which I thought I might as well share with you.  It made me smile.

 

Halloween is a great time for ghost stories!  This story happened some time ago in Dublin, and even though it sounds like an Alfred Hitchcock tale, it’s true.

John Bradford, a Dublin University student, was on the side of the road hitchhiking on a very dark night and in the midst of a big storm.

The night was rolling on and no car went by. The storm was so strong he could hardly see a few feet ahead of him. Suddenly, he saw a car slowly coming towards him and stopped.

John, desperate for shelter and without thinking about it, got into the car and closed the door... Only to realize there was nobody behind the wheel and the engine wasn’t on. The car started moving slowly. John looked at the road ahead and saw a curve approaching. Scared, he started to pray, begging for his life. Then, just before the car hit the curve, a hand appeared out of nowhere through the window, and turned the wheel. John, paralyzed with terror, watched as the hand came through the window, but never touched or harmed him.

Shortly thereafter, John saw the lights of a pub appear down the road, so, gathering strength; he jumped out of the car and ran to it. Wet and out of breath, he rushed inside and started telling everybody about the horrible experience he had just had.

A silence enveloped the pub when everybody realized he was crying... And wasn’t drunk.

Suddenly, the door opened, and two other people walked in from the dark and stormy night. They, like John, were also soaked and out of breath. Looking around, and seeing John Bradford sobbing at the bar, one said to the other...

Look, Paddy... there’s that idiot that got in the car while we were pushing it! -

 



Tuesday

Just to say the headache continues.   It is not too bad if I keep still and pressure is applied, so I sit up in bed with my head pressed back against the pillows.   At least I can sew and watch television while doing that.

I hope to go to the hospital tomorrow for my chaplaincy round.   I'll see how it goes.

Monday 28th October

Am not feeling too well, one of those long term headaches at the base of my skull has set in.  I dread them because they take weeks to shift.    Poor Bubbles was a casualty of it.  She likes to go out on the porch just for a short while in the evening, but before I could let her back in I had taken a pain relieving sleep aid, and fell fast asleep until 5 o'clock.  I jumped up, let her in, went back to bed, and she climbed into my arms.   She wrapped her little paws around them, was literally clinging to me (this is why I wear long sleeved night shirts)    Bless.

 

 So not done a lot....watched the news

In the news.......

It has been said that molten lava is a new kind of weather phenomenon, and the news has been following the progress of this lava in Hawaii, slowly moving and advancing...

Hundreds of people are leaving their homes.  They haven't made it mandatory, but no one is going to stay put in the face of that.

Sadly, in the Washington state shooting another child has died..  It has been revealed that the gunman, the 15 year old kid, texted the victims and asked them to meet him in the cafeteria, then he followed them in and shot them.  The remaining victims are still in very critical condition.

The school is situated on part of the Reservation of the Tulalip Indians, and the gunman was a tribal member, I think all, or some, of the victims  were as well.  I am familiar with the tribes round here, the Absentee Shawnee; Seminoles; Citizen Potawatomie; the Sac and Fox Nation; the Choctaws; and I have heard of Apaches and Cherokees, mainly from John Wayne movies, but I had never heard of the Tulalip Tribe.

I wish I'd had my camera ready when they showed a picture of the house, because it looked quite nice and sizeable, a bargain I would have thought, for £140,000.

This evening a couple of Fr Clark's friends organised a dinner for him and his wife at a downtown restaurant.    There were 20 there from Emmanuel and Shawnee Peace Fellowship, and it was very pleasant.   They leave Shawnee tomorrow, the 29th.         

Saturday 25th October

It has been hot today, in the 90s, I needed to cool down the car before I went out.

Most of the nation appears to have been pretty warm.

In the news.....................

I am sure you heard about the school shooting in Washington state.

This young lad, reported to be well liked and the son of a well known, prominent family, walked into the school cafeteria, killed one person and seriously wounded four others, two of whom were his cousins.

 

We all remember the Dunblane massacre in 1996, when 16 small children and a teacher were shot - it is etched into our national consciousness - hand guns were banned after that, and there hasn't been a school shooting since.  But unbelievably in this country, 297 people have been killed in school shootings since 1980,  and people still reckon they are safer for being allowed to have guns.  I can't fathom it, I just can't.

 

Friday 24th October

The burglars in this case broke into a house and deliberately woke up the owner, shining torches in her face and demanding money.   How brazen is that!!!!!!!!!!!!!   And how absolutely terrifying for the poor woman.  I tell you, I've double locked my doors tonight.  

They must have known she was a little old lady who wouldn't have a gun under her pillow, like the rest of the population.   And I'm now considering it, they're easy enough to get hold of, you can buy them in Walmart.

It has been another lovely warm day, it was 83 as I drove through town.   I just went out to pick up something for supper as I didn't feel like cooking, and I got a  piece of medium rare steak with a few chips  and mushrooms, for about $4, or £2.50.   Food is so amazingly cheap here.

I haven't done a lot today.  When I woke up this morning I was coughing and blowing my nose, and rang Bill at the hospital to say I didn't think I should go in for my chaplaincy round.   But a little while later I was fine.  I think it must have been allergies,   everyone here suffers from allergies, mostly caused by the cedar trees.

 I was working on a needlework project while watching television and all the horrific news of terror attacks, and a new Ebola case in New York.       This latest victim was a health worker from Liberia who had been caring for Ebola patients, and who arrived a week ago, and has since been merrily riding round Manhattan and the other boroughs on the crowded public transport system, eating in restaurants, and bowling.  People keep saying it is hard to catch, but it still seems very irresponsible to me.

And I talked to Jeremy who was stuck in traffic on the M25, and I marvelled - as I often do - at 21st century technology which makes that possible.

The Electricity Saga

Was out early, before 9 - had breakfast at the hospital.   I didn't want to explain to Mark's lad that I and my partner-in-crime, Bruno, had been tinkering with the breaker box just before all the power and lights went out on the porch and the living room.

 

So had breakfast, did my chaplaincy round, went home, and lo and behold..... all is well.  Lights go on in the living room and the porch, and the spare bedroom.   Even the electric outlet in the computer room - that same outlet that caused me to move my computer to another wall - even that outlet is now working.

 

So I have no idea what went wrong, or what Timothy did to put it right, but for now everything electrical is working fine.  And with the best will in the world I think Bruno should stick to pastoring his church, I don't know if he was an electrician in Cameroon but he is not cut out for it in the US.

 

 I was looking online for a little story to fill up the Kiwani's bulletin, and this was what I found.

A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.

Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen.

"Careful," he said. "CAREFUL! Put in some more butter!

Oh my Goodness! You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY!

Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK!

Careful . CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never!

Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind?

Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!"

The wife stared at him. "What in the world is wrong with you? You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"

The husband calmly replied, "I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving."